今日砸诗改诗

By Ouyang Yu

 早上上来一首匿名诗，如下：

《好色之秋》

好敞亮天空的蓝色白色
好匍匐地面的草色花色
好山里流出的水色
好水中宁静的山色
好透风透光透过围栏的声色
在眼抛出视线之前
飞来了几片叶的语色

我上来就评论道：“2都不错，最后两句坏掉了！改改吧”。我改如下：

《好色之秋》

好敞亮天空的蓝色白色
好匍匐地面的草色花色
好山里流出的水色
好水中宁静的山色
好透风透光透过围栏的声色
好眼抛出视线之前飞来了几片叶语的
好色

接着又改了：

《好色之秋》

好敞亮天空的蓝色白色
好匍匐地面的草色花色
好山里流出的水色
好水中宁静的山色
好透风透光透过围栏的声色
好眼抛出视线之前飞来了几片叶语的
好色个毬：Ah Qiu，對不起，打了個噴嚏！

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